3-24-12

I hat it when I have things I want to say but I don't know how to begin them.  I sit and stare at a blank screen and mentally sketch out the endings, the perfect middle and then write and rewrite the beginning because it just doesn't sound right.  I know what I want to say I just don't know how to get there from here.  I'm like my daughter when she drives a car.  How can we have lived somewhere for almost a year and she still doesn't know how to get home from the grocery store?  The grocery store we go to at least once a week if not more? Is she concentrating so much on the driving that she doesn't even see the signs on the way or is it that she's so distracted by life when I'm driving that she tunes out her surroundings and doesn't pay attention? It's really hard to tell but I tend to think it's a lot of the latter.  For a smart girl she can be pretty clueless, but then can't we all?  Which is funny because that's kinda what I'm trying to write about...how clueless people can be about things.  How they can miss the obvious right in front of them.  It's weird how things can hide in plain sight. We just overlook them because it seems too easy and nothing good is ever easy or so I've been told thousands of times in my life.  It's the things we work for tht we appreciate.  But I don't think that's always true.  Sometimes we appreciate gift even more than the things we earn because we know that there's no way we could get them on our own.  Like the lottery.  I'd totally appreciate it.  Is God reading that?  I'd be a great lottery winner because I know that there's no way I could be a millionaire without the help of the Almighty.  Goodness knows I'm not going to get there under my own steam.  I'm a bit too lazy for that.  Which is probably why I'll never win the darn thing.  God knows it wouldn't be good for me no matter how much I liked it.  I need things to do because I could totally be a curl up in bed eating bon bons girl while the maid cleaned around me.  May be not bon bons though because I'm not sure what they are.  I'd definitely eat cream puffs those because they are made of Yum! And I'd get to the point where the maid had to clean because my cream puff eating butt wouldn't be able to get out of bed, so I'm better off without the money I suppose.  I'd still be grateful though, so He can maybe rethink the whole it wouldn't be good for me thing?  Or not.  I just really need to figure out where to begin this thing which is probably completely obvious like "stop thinking about it and just write." so I will.